It’s my birthday and I’m eating cake!

Eat cake on your birthday, you deserve it!

Remember when the only thing you had to worry about on your birthday was what kind of cake you were having? We didn’t have a birthday party every year with friends, but we did have a family birthday dinner and my grandmother always made us any kind of ice cream cake we wanted for our birthday. We felt so special. She would line the pan with lady fingers, put in each layer of ice cream and layer each one with crushed chocolate cookies. In the end, it was the best birthday cake ever, even though there technically was no cake.

I miss those days. Life isn’t so simple anymore. Should I eat cake? Do I need the calories? What kind of cake would everyone else like? What about the ones who don’t like ice cream? When I was young, I just wanted what I wanted and I was happy to get all the focus on me that day. That didn’t happen often with a single mom who worked two jobs. But that one day, it was all about me.

But why does that have to change? Why shouldn’t we have at least one day a year that is all about us? If we spend our days, weeks, months thinking about others, what’s wrong with having one day where they all think about us? I was taught that thinking of yourself is selfish, but that’s not actually true. As a mother, it’s taken me years to realize that it’s important for me to do the things that I want to do in order to keep my sanity. I’m a better mother when I don’t feel as if my entire life is focused on others. I’m a better wife when I don’t feel as if it’s a chore to be there. A few hours of shopping, a new purse, a day out with my friends, etc. It’s called attitude adjustment and we all need it.

So, it’s my birthday tomorrow. I’m making an ice cream cake with lady fingers (if I can find them), layers of my favorite ice cream and crushed cookies. What are you doing on your birthday?


Is there a theme in your life? Mine is Paris, and it’s spooky


Paris keeps popping up in my life, like a dear friend who keeps tugging at my sleeve as if to say, look at me! And since I’ve always believed that everything happens for a reason, I’m noticing all these references to the city of lights for a purpose. What purpose? I’m not sure… I’ll count them down for you, then you tell me if it means anything.

1. A friend of mine took her three children on a fabulous vacation to Paris and has been posting photos of them, at the Eiffel Tower and more, throughout the past week on Facebook. Lovely photos and I look at them and sigh. I can just hear the Edith Piaf in the background.

2. A friend is visiting my neck of the woods and we met for lunch. She has to excuse herself and when she comes back, she says, “I had to take that call. My daughter is in Paris right now and I don’t want to miss speaking to her.” I heard all about her trip and we discussed Paris for another hour.

3. We decided to go to the movies that afternoon, my friend and I. What did we see? You guessed it, Midnight in Paris. A wonderful Woody Allen film that makes Paris even more beautiful and inspiring. I want to go even more now, only I want to be transported back to the 1920’s while I’m there. He met Hemingway and Fitzgerald, for goodness sake. How cool is that?

4. I started a new book this week in anticipation of the movie, Sarah’s Key. This is about the Nazi’s right? Well, guess where the main character lives? You guessed it, Paris. The sights and smells, the old apartment owned by her husband’s grandmother with ancient plumbing and quaint cafe on the corner. I can smell the coffee already. I can taste the wine and hear the cobblestones beneath my feet.

5. I had lunch with a friend a few days ago. I haven’t seen her in a few weeks, she’s been busy remodeling her home. She’s decided to take her kids on a vacation this summer before they get too old. They are going….wait for it….you guessed it! Europe, including Paris! What the heck? I’m so happy for her and she’s so excited, but I had to ask myself, did I put that in her head? I carry Paris around with me now in my pocket. I hear it every day, I see it when I close my eyes. I think people feel Paris when they are around me, or is it the other way around?

Am I looking for it, or is it calling me? I don’t have an opportunity to travel to Paris unless I make one. Nobody is inviting me over, there are no writers’ conferences with cheap airfare, so what’s the deal?

I have come to believe that my book must have Paris in it. I am being called to breathe, write, imagine and live Paris through my writing. For now, I will watch all the movies I can with Paris, I will keep reading all I can, and I will wait for the call that I’ve won the wonderful, all-expense paid trip to Paris to write in a small apartment overlooking a cafe with chic, artsy people who welcome me every morning with my laptop and conversation. Don’t wake me just yet!

Thanks to for the Eiffel Tower shot. Someday…